Investor Relations
Bad News.
You Can't Invest in Nectar.Pay.
No seed round · No VCs · No board · No exit
There was no seed round. There was no Series A. We didn't sell our souls to the overlords and hedgies in a glass-walled conference room in Menlo Park. Nobody got a board seat in exchange for a wire transfer.
We don't have anything against capital. It's just not how we do it.
Because every good project driven by decentralized ethos but controlled by centralized capital eventually ends up right back where it started: gatekeeping who's allowed to transact, and taking a cut for the privilege.
Vertex Horizon Capital
Series A — $14,000,000
This firm does not exist. We invented them. Their 'portfolio' is a list of companies that went public in dreams. Does it make us look more impressive?
Exhibit A: The Competition
The crypto payments industry has raised, conservatively, north of three quarters of a billion dollars in venture money. Here's what that money bought:
Processes ~220 transactions per day. Globally. After 14 years and Series B from Index Ventures. Decides who's an approved merchant and charges 1–2% for the favor.
Froze $63M of USDC on Tornado Cash addresses the day OFAC asked. The currency is programmable — programmable by them.
Insiders cashed out $150M to themselves in the Series A. Customers wait days for KYC and pay 4.5% to buy their own money.
Acquired by Bolt for $1.5B. Deal collapsed. Company collapsed. Customer funds stuck. The textbook centralized-rails ending.
We took zero dollars. We'll do BitPay's annual volume in our first month and we won't ask anyone for permission to do it.
Schrödinger's Fund
Strategic Round — $8,000,000
Simultaneously our largest investor and not an investor at all. When we opened the term sheet, the signature collapsed into a single probability. Are we more trustworthy with this here?
So How Do You Win With Us?
Nectar.Pay is built on the TEXITcoin ecosystem — a project picking up where the Bitcoin community left off in 2017, when the early adopters got rich and the banks took over.
If you like what we're doing and want to support it, the path is embarrassingly simple:
The Whole Pitch
Buy. Hold. Trade. TXC.
TEXITcoin is made-in-America, mined in Texas, available on well-respected markets and exchanges, and out since 2024. Nectar.Pay is one of the very first products built on it — and we're just getting started.
Grab Some TXC. Right Here.
No exchange signup. No KYC tollbooth. Send stablecoins from any major chain, get TXC delivered to your wallet. Powered by our friends at swap.honest.money.
Embedded live. Having trouble? Open in a new tab →
Ghost Money Capital
Series B — $22,000,000
Invisible LPs. Invisible returns. Zero portfolio companies. One very convincing landing page that loads to a 404. They don't return phone calls.
The Plan
Our goal is stupidly simple. You can write it on a napkin:
- 10,000 merchants in 6 months.
- 100 sales at each merchant per week.
- Promotion and customers referred via our partnership with CryptoPOP.
- A direct line to disrupt the boring, tired payment services industry and establish crypto as a real, usable, valuable alternative to existing rails.
We're going to do to the card network industry what Dollar Shave Club did to Gillette.
Case Study: Dollar Shave Club vs. Gillette
In 2011 Gillette owned 70% of the global razor market. A multi-billion-dollar fortress with NFL ad budgets, Olympic sponsorships, and patent-protected five-blade engineering nobody asked for.
Then a guy named Michael Dubin made a $4,500 YouTube video that opened with "Our blades are f***ing great." Five years later Unilever bought his company for $1 billion in cash. Gillette's market share collapsed from 70% to under 50%. They're still bleeding.
Gillette didn't lose because their razors got worse. They lost because they kept charging $32 for something that should cost $3, and a smaller, faster, honest competitor walked in the door and said so out loud.
Sound familiar? 2.9% + 30¢ is the new five-blade titanium-coated swivel-head razor cartridge.
Case Study: Kodak vs. The Camera Phone
Kodak invented the digital camera in 1975. Their own engineer, Steven Sasson, built the first one. Management shelved it because it threatened the film business.
By 1996 Kodak was worth $28 billion with 140,000 employees. By 2012 they filed for bankruptcy. Not because digital photography failed — because they refused to disrupt their own profitable, boring, gatekept rail.
The card networks invented the rails that crypto runs circles around. They know it. They're shelving it. The Kodak moment for payments isn't coming — it's here, and we're holding the camera.
Imaginary Number Partners
Seed — $6,000,000
They claim a 47x return on zero deployed capital. Their IRR involves the square root of negative one. Their due diligence was a calculus textbook.
TL;DR
You can't buy a piece of Nectar.Pay. But you can buy a piece of the digital commodity from the rail it runs on, join the community that built it, and help write the bright future it's pulling toward us.
Pick up a handful of TXC.
Why Are We Doing All This?
Two reasons. First, we think crypto is the most honest money civilization has ever seen — and yet the crypto industry is doing it all wrong. Distracted by shiny things, everyone forgot to get crypto used as money before moving on to the fun stuff. That's okay. We'll do that part.
Second, for TEXITcoin to win (that's our upside), we need real utility, purpose and value to come from our work, efforts and results. So we're killing two birds with one stone: building the important service the industry forgot, and increasing TXC's value in the marketplace.
If we're right — we'll get rich. Win along with us.
Disclaimers & Fine Print
- Fake investors are fake. The logos and firm names scattered across this page are entirely fictional. They do not exist. They have never existed. No money changed hands. No term sheets were signed. No 6am Pacific Zoom calls were endured. They are satirical decorations parodying the "proudly backed by" badges every other startup plasters on their website. If you believed they were real, that's kind of the point.
- Not financial advice. We are not financial advisors. We are not even sure we're qualified to advise you on what to have for lunch.
- Past performance does not indicate future results. In our case, there is no past performance because we haven't started yet.
- No animals were harmed in the making of this page. Several egos were bruised.
- TEXITcoin may go up, down, or sideways. That's generally how markets work.
- This page contains satire. If you are a regulatory body, please re-read the first sentence of this list.